Sunday, July 13, 2008

Teeth check

You'd tell me if I had spinach in my teeth, right? What if my slip was showing or my skirt was tucked up into my underwear? I'm sure you would.

I'm trying to decide if I should approach a woman who I know, but not well, who appears to be struggling with a major issue. I'm sure I don't have a solution to her problem but I wonder if she needs a listening ear. If she was my friend, it would be a no-brainer. I would say, "Hey, it looks like you're dealing with something big. Let's get some help." But because she is only an acquaintance it becomes a little tricky. I would never want to add to someone's problems.

I will definitely be praying for her, but I would like to take an extra step and reach out in some way. I just don't know how to do it in a manner that allows this woman to keep her dignity. That means the anonymous note is out. Telling her everyone in town is talking about her is out. I've talked with a friend about it (yeah, you LD) and she is thinking about it, too.

I always remember the time that I had my wisdom teeth out. My face was black and blue. It looked like someone had punched me repeatedly. I remember the shocked looks that strangers gave me and thought it was funny at the time. But later I thought how sad it was that not one person whispered a question in my ear, asking me if I was alright. If I needed any help.

We've all seen people who have all the sudden put on 50, 60, 70 pounds or another person who looks like they are starving themselves to death. People spending money they have no business spending. Mothers who are a tad too neglectful, but not yet in a dangerous way and men who can't communicate with their families, kids who try things that are just a little too dangerous. When do you say something? Or do we? Most the time I say it's none of my business, but is that always the best answer?

So for now I am waiting. If I'm meant to say something, I'm sure that God will open the door and maybe the topic can be brought up as a natural part of the conversation. I'll let you know what happens.

What's your opinion?
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Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I'd pray too. For the opening and for her. Your empathy is terrific.

Is that you with the spinach? You are so young and pretty!

Jen said...

I'm thinking that if you've noticed whatever it is, then she knows it, too, and is dealing--or not dealing--in the manner of her choosing. If she gives you a true opening I'd go for it, but then and only then.

Mr.Brian said...

That is a hard one.
Speaking from experiance when I was deeply depressed, I was thankful that a friend stepped in to help.
I do not know the problem or the person,but here is my thought.
If you know the person fairly well just ask if things are OK, or if she would like to talk.I feel if you say I am concerned and wondering if I could help or if you want to talk.Maybe this person is so hurting and does not know how to ask for the help she needs.
If you want to talk more in person, stop bye when you see me outside reading at night.
I could go on and on about how thankful I was to have a friend help me.I honestly think it is why I am still hear today.

You do know I am the guy at the end of your alley?

historygirlie said...

I would wait for the opening as well, so she doesn't feel "attacked". I hope she is able to get out of her issue successfully.

Thanks for the nice compliment about the "Ugly Pink Dress"! I'm glad someone thinks it was attractive! :)